By Bob Lancer
The baby, upon physical entry into the world outside the womb, feels departed from his homeworld world, the “wombworld” in which he has existed for his entire life. It takes nine months to fully acclimate to his new world, an acclimation that constitutes an utter metamorphosis. It is only then that she finally feels like a native of her new reality. Respecting this transition phase is essential to the infant’s good feeling and well-being, and sets the pattern for that being’s way of moving through all of the transitions of life that follow.
The emergence into a disconnected physical condition could not be more profound. The feeling of physical union within the mother has not only been constant before birth, it has been absolutely necessary for survival, and the womb-child or “wombian” has an instinctive response to this. This is why so much holding is begged for by the new baby, and appropriate, even essential to provide, particularly from her mother whose body has been one with his own for a lifetime.
Compassionately, sensitively acknowledge this deep dimension of the child’s disorientation by generously, even copiously cuddling this innocent this “stranger in a strange land”, this “fish out of water”. This makes for a happier, healthier, more secure baby, and a happier, healthier, more secure individual for life.
The parent’s sense of estrangement toward this otherworldly being is natural. Give yourself time to bond with this human creature whose eyes wander from yours. Allow yourself to fall in love naturally, but endlessly, and you will. As you do, your love opens the pathway, spiritually and physically, for the infant to emerge gracefully from the wombian stage.
You will fall in love naturally as you observe the face of your heavenly gift with your heart open. When you feel the slightest stirring there, hold your attention on that stirring. Your power flows in the direction of your attention. Imagine that through the radiance of your loving gaze flows your love into the child’s heart, nurturing the flowering of that new heart. When that new heart feels like your heart, you have fallen in love.
Treasure this fleeting period of your wombian’s raw nature. Release any pressure you feel to have the child move more quickly into expressions of “humanhood” with which you can more easily identify. Let your heart meld with the pure innocent heart of the babe to rekindle your innocent love’s core. Enjoy the blank-stare-stage of the alien, even as the infant seems more oriented to a previous life, emits an uncomfortable, if not painful sense of belonging in some “otherwhere”.
Patience permits you to be at peace with, not at war against, what how your child is. It places you and your child on the same side. Power struggles drain power. Patience permits the blossoming of beauty in our natural world. Your patience is a balm that soothes the newborn’s sense of extreme openness and essential otherness . Patience permits your adoration to expand until you once again contain this living gift within you.