Pregnancy
Understanding Your Personal Style and Strengths During Pregnancy- Part 2
NaturalTransition.com is thrilled to publish a series of articles written for
pregnant women by Dr. Caron Goode to help them determine an easy way to go through their
pregnancy based upon their core temperament or what Dr. Goode calls their personal
style.
You Deserve to Feel Great
by Dr. Caron Goode
www.acpi.biz
The childbearing stage extends from conception through the first year of your baby’s life. Some women include the time before they get pregnant as well. No matter where you start counting, how you perceive and approach life in general is the backdrop to how you move through this special, vulnerable time.
A woman becoming a mother goes through distinct never-before-experienced changes, and this event profoundly affects the rest of her life. Young women may have trouble imagining the changes. And nearly every woman who has given birth will say it is a bigger change than they ever imagined. How they make their journey through pregnancy and birth will affect how they parent. Leah’s son is now twelve-years-old. On the cusp of adolescence, he is withdrawing emotionally form her- something she inadvertently taught him. She never had any more children because pregnancy and birth were traumatic, and she vowed to never do it again, much to her husband’s disappointment. A woman’s perception of her pregnancy, health care and personal support colors her views of herself and her child.
We women have a significant investment in assuring our health and well being during our pregnancies. There are a variety of ways to achieve this. Let’s start with helping you discover the following truths about yourself so you can design the perfect pregnancy support program:
- Your personal style
- How you process information
- Whether you are people or task-oriented
- How events in the world affect your inner core
- Your stress boundaries and resiliency levels
- Whether you are most vulnerable in your physical, emotional, mental or spiritual realm.
- How to design an optimal program for feeling great.
Personal Style
The most pervasive influence in our lives, especially during pregnancy, when all our senses are heightened, is our personal style. Personal style is the way we perceive, approach and interact in the world. When we’re pregnant, our personal style intensifies. A woman like Barb who has a "behavioral" style will read everything she can on pregnancy and birth. She’ll have the nursery decorated, the layette ready, a detailed birth plan and a freezer full of casseroles. It might drive her crazy to listen to a woman like Alicia talk about how she feels like a goddess, a sign of an "affective" personal style. Alicia loves the feeling of being pregnant. She likes to wear skintight clothes and lets her belly show. She’s in a dance class for pregnant women, and she works with a midwife. Pregnancy makes her feel sensual and powerful.
Both of these women develop a mindfulness pregnancy plan that works for them by following their innate tendencies of interacting with the world. While it might be fun for Barb to wear a leotard and take a dance class and be helpful for Alicia to write down her vision for birth, it’s not necessarily important that they do. What is important is that they develop an approach that works for them.
We don’t want to make Alicia anxious that she’s not doing pregnancy right by insisting that she order her crib by the six-month of pregnancy. Generating expectations for ourselves based on someone else’s style or agenda can make women feel depressed and anxious during their pregnancy.
One of the latest studies shows that 1 out of every 4 women experiences depression during pregnancy. Researchers at the University of Toronto surveyed more than 19,000 women and 7.4% of them reported being depressed during the first trimester, 12.8% in the second and 12% in the third trimester.
By learning about your personal style along with how you process information, your orientation to tasks, your stress and resilience levels and where you are vulnerable (physical, emotional, mental or spiritual realm), then you can design a personal program for your pregnancy; you can optimize your pregnancy and entry into motherhood.
Start by reading this simple affirmation aloud: My pregnancy is healthy. I glow with the fullness of life. My baby is strong and feels well. I move through my day gracefully and with ease. My baby is relaxed and content. When I think of my child, I smile; and when I feel movement inside, I want to celebrate. My child feels wanted and appreciated. I am a beautiful, healthy and capable pregnant woman.
Reading the above paragraph each day helps your body relax and gives you more energy during your pregnancy. Reading it provides instructions to your subconscious mind on how you want to feel. This activity is an example of training yourself to think optimally. While imagery is helpful for all of us, the strategy works best for people who are cognitively oriented and like ideas and information. If your personal style is cognitive, you will like to read and research during pregnancy to educate yourself.
What if your style of approaching and interacting with the world is not cognitive, but is behavioral, affective or interpersonal- the other three main styles? A behavioral person will just do whatever works for making you healthy and calm. Discipline comes easy. An affective person interacts with the world through feeling, and they need positivity and creativity during pregnancy to express feelings. Affective women like to dream about their child and feel the bonding between you. A woman with an interpersonal style likes things to go smoothly and expects support without conflict during pregnancy. She will likely create a warm team of friendly support for her pregnancy.
If you understand your innate style of interacting with people and the environment, then you plan for and control your life in a safe, easy way. This is imperative during pregnancy because your body otherwise takes over and you cannot control your responses to life and enjoy the beautiful miracle of it all. The key to successful planning and managing stress and activity throughout your pregnancy is to know your natural inclination. Then, you can:
- Design your environment to suit your needs
- Plan ahead for stressful situations
- Know where to focus your energy efficiently
- Plan for the help you will need
- Be true to yourself and your temperament
- Use your gifts and talents accordingly
©2009 by Dr. Caron Goode. Goode is
gifted with compassion in assisting others to effect lasting transformation
through spiritual coaching, books, classes and seminars. Caron’s continuous
education, experience in psychology and professional writing makes her a great
resource for parents wishing to create and maintain a nurturing relationship
their children. She has positioned the Academy for Coaching Parents
International (www.acpi.biz ) at the forefront of the parent
coaching movement to disseminate the coaching model of empowerment for parents.
Newest book – Raising Intuitive Children at www.raisingintuitivechildren.com
If you found the above column useful, feel free to share it with
friends. To subscribe yourself to Caron’s Coaching Corner, send an email to caron30@gmail.com .Upon subscribing, you will
receive the Coaching Corner once a month.
more:
- First Trimester
- Second Trimester
- Third Trimester
- Pregnancy Care Options
Personal Style in Pregnancy Articles By Dr. Caron Goode:
- Part 1- Mindfulness During Pregnancy
- Part 3- Understanding Your Personal Style
- Part 4- Mental Fitness for the Whole Women